goodness is doing its work in me, and it’s face looks a lot like trial.
every time I go to the beach I spend the first day clinging to the sand. terrified of the waves and the way they crash, white foam sputtering, into themselves. flinging bits of sand and seaweed into the salty air. thrashing upon the shore like violent fists coming down hard on a pillow of gritty sand.
perhaps it’s childish. perhaps I’m just not very brave.
but they scare me at first. every time. no matter how old I get.
I imagine getting thrashed and pummeled by those angry fists of water and foam. imagine getting dragged like a rake through turbulent under-currents. just thinking about it sends little spurts of anxiety, like lightning, through my chest.
ah, yes. goodness is doing its work in me, and it feels a lot like being drowned, sputtering and gurgling, to the bottom of a swirling ocean.
and if I’m honest… the shore feels so much safer, so much objectively smarter, so much kinder to a battered & waterlogged heart.
but the sand is only smooth from being softened.
and I am only gentle from being rubbed the wrong way till all my sharp edges are gone. Continue reading “SOFTENED LIKE SAND”
today I want to chat with you about a topic that can be really triggering and scary for some of us. it’s been weighing on my heart & I want to just get this truth out of me and shed some light on it okay?
many of us are probably familiar with the terms of sexual abuse/domestic abuse/emotional abuse… these are all deeply dehumanizing and disturbing behaviors that need to be called out & shut down. but something that so many people I know have been a victim of, and which most people don’t even seem to realize exists, is a despicable thing called spiritual abuse.
what is spiritual abuse?
spiritual abuse comes in many forms and wears many disguises. it can be subtle and hard to recognize or loud and blatant. here are just a few ways it can read its ugly head…
MISUSE OF SCRIPTURE
spiritual abuse most often happens when people throw around scripture incorrectly and without reverence, such as using it: out of context, to shame, to ostracize, to excuse or perpetrate cruel behaviors, to prove a point, to shut down a conversation, to silence, to blame, to mock, to build their high horse, to belittle, to brush off, to shrink your pain, to avoid the topic, to divert attention away from their own faults, with condescension, with anger, without kindness… the list could go on. the bottom line here is this: if you have ever been belittled, shamed, brushed off, silenced, or made to feel like your pain was irrelevant with quoted scripture, you have been a victim of spiritual abuse.
THE NARROW ROAD COMPLEX Continue reading “SPIRITUAL ABUSE // WHAT IT IS & HOW TO GET FREE”
ever had someone tell you that you “just need to have more faith”?
aside from being kind of judgy & just plain unhelpful (that’s a blog post for an entirely different time), it’s biblically inaccurate and impossible. yeah, you did actually read that correctly. 😉 and there’s an overflowing amount of freedom that comes with no longer striving for this imaginary amount of faith you have to reach in order to no longer be deemed “less than” or “not enough” by humanity.
I mean, let’s take it back and actually look at scripture, okay?
“For I say, through the grace that was given me… think reasonably, as God has apportioned to each person a measure of faith.”
did you catch that? yeah, you’ve already been given every ounce of faith you need, planted deep in your soul since the moment you said “yes” to healing. it’s already been measured out, and Divine Love didn’t shortchange you. I promise.
you don’t need “more faith”, because Jesus doesn’t deprive us of what our souls need.
you don’t need “more faith”, because you weren’t haphazardly tossed together.
you don’t need “more faith”, because the power of grace didn’t run out before it got to you.
you don’t need “more faith”, because Divine Love doesn’t allow you to suffer meaninglessly.
you don’t need “more faith”, because He isn’t dangling it in front of your nose, then handing it to someone else. Continue reading “YOU DON’T NEED MORE FAITH… THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE, ANYWAY”
aaaaand a show of hands for everyone who starts off the new year completely goal-crazed, wild-eyed, over-committed, and caffeine-fueled? and what about that resolution overwhelm?
you too? yup. that’s about right. I knew I couldn’t be the only one. 😉
well, this year I’m doing things a bit differently.
if you read this blog post, (if you haven’t… read it now ’cause you’re missing out, babe!) you’ll already know I’ve forgone resolutions, goals, and all the chaos that comes with them, and instead opted for an ultra-simple system that focuses on wholeness and staying true to who I am discovering myself to be & what I most need and desire out of life.
aka: no stress, all becoming. sounds just about divine, right?!
so, to celebrate my cutting of ties to the chaos that binds us this time of year, I’ve decided to host a really awesome mini online course for you all to kick off your 2017 in freedom and wholeness!
it’s called “ABC’s of the full & beautiful life”, and it’s a 26-day journey (starting January 2nd!), each day introducing a new word, designed to help inspire a more whole YOU, which corresponds to the next letter in the alphabet.
it’s for you if:
~ you really want to pick your #oneword365 but can’t decide what word is best for you OR
~ you don’t know what 2017 will hold, or how you want to enter it, but you need a bit of gentle direction while you decide OR
~ you just want more untidy grace in your life OR
~ you’re craving community with people who are trying to figure out this whole life and transition and new year thing OR
~ you need some structure OR
~ you need some inspiration
(or all of the above!)
Continue reading “THE FULL & BEAUTIFUL LIFE // A FREE E-COURSE!”
so… you should probably pour yourself a cup of coffee and get cozy for a second.
it’s one of those heart-to-heart, wish-we-were-doing-this-in-person kinda posts. it’s one that I want to chat about friend-to-friend, and let you know that this Holy Becoming thing is so hard and good and just incredible. I want to tell you about all the crazy ways God is real and big and just present here in new ways lately. I want to talk about how wild this journey is and how wonderfully terrible it can be to grow into a more Jesus-like creature, to grow into more of who we’re made to be.
I guess I’ll just jump right in, then.
when I was growing up, I was kind of a doormat.
no, really. I have always had a really tough struggle when it comes to communicating and voicing what I need and want from situations and people.
I’m a chronic “yes” girl. saying no is HARD. so, for years I would go long periods without saying it, and then suddenly burst into a stubborn fit of “no!” to make up for the pent-up fear and frustration that I had allowed to build. this took its toll on friendships and situations in which I’d end up used and bitter because I’d stayed quiet and small instead of being vocal and brave. Continue reading “HOW PREGNANCY HAS HELPED ME FIND MY VOICE”