MENTAL ILLNESS & MOTHERHOOD

maybe you know that my husband & I were surprised by a beautiful, amazing, gorgeous, sweet-natured, PERFECT (of course) little baby girl who was born just over a month ago. her name is Iola, and we love her to bits and pieces. though not literally. cause that would be odd. and unfortunate. 😉

maybe you also know that I have generalized anxiety disorder & clinical depression. the first time I remember experiencing a very-not-normal type of anxiety, I was only five years old, although it really came at me like a punch in the gut the summer after I turned 16.

if you’ve been around the blog for very long, you probably know both of those things. but here’s something you might not know:

mental illnesses like these run in my family.
and my husband’s family.

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and for this reason, I was never really sure I wanted to have my own children.

so…
sweet, freshly-diagnosed girl looking out into her future with these fears, this is for you.
strong mama in the double trenches of mental illness & motherhood, this is for you.
tentative pregnant gal who never had to think about this until you had to go cold turkey off your meds, this is for you.
anyone who loves a mama with a mental illness, this is for you. Continue reading “MENTAL ILLNESS & MOTHERHOOD”

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IOLA’S COZY BOHO NURSERY REVEAL

I’ll keep the words short & sweet on this post, because I want you to totally enjoy all the photos of our little Io’s nursery! ❤

we finally finished up her part of our bedroom, and I am just so in love with how sweet and cozy and homey it is. it makes my heart happy to see her little space, and anticipate how so soon, a little girl will be living in here with us!

cozy boho is a pretty good description of the feel of her nursery, I think. I wanted to create a space perfect for cuddling, with smart and beautiful storage, and a vibe that could both mesh with an adult bedroom while also growing with her (I think these pieces can all be easily transitioned to a big-girl room as she gets older!)

so come on in & cuddle up in Iola’s cozy boho nursery… shhh, baby’s sleeping 😉

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had to throw in a little bump picture because she’s gotten so big! (doctor estimates 7lb 3oz  & SUPER LONG at her due date!) so much for fearing having a teeny preemie! Continue reading “IOLA’S COZY BOHO NURSERY REVEAL”

10 REALLY SHALLOW REASONS I’M EXCITED TO NOT BE PREGNANT

besides the obvious (and totally NOT shallow) reason of having my baby girl in my arms as opposed to my stomach, there are lots of reasons I’m super pumped to no longer be pregnant.

several of them aren’t shallow at all. being a family of three, getting to know this amazing little person, seeing my husband become a father…

and while I know that motherhood isn’t all sunshine and roses (I’ve seen the contents of a diaper, y’all), there’s so much good about it!

but today…? I’m celebrating the shallow & silly reasons why I’m excited for the next stage in this journey 😉

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10 REALLY SHALLOW REASONS I’M EXCITED TO NOT BE PREGNANT Continue reading “10 REALLY SHALLOW REASONS I’M EXCITED TO NOT BE PREGNANT”

10 MOST-LOVED BLOG POSTS OF 2016

as 2016 comes to a close, and we get ready for 2017 to make her grand debut, I thought it would be fun to take a little trip down memory lane, and revisit all the blog posts from this year that were YOUR favorites ❤

this is a little countdown of the 10 posts that were the most-viewed from 2016, in the order of least views to most views (there are a couple of exceptions, as I didn’t include any photography or business-themed posts).

THANK YOU for all of the love you have poured into this little corner of the interwebs ❤ your encouragement, comments, and sweet emails & messages have made my days brighter and my heart lighter. you are why I write, friends.

are you ready?!

I am! 🙂

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here are the 10 MOST-LOVED BLOG POSTS OF 2016

enjoy browsing through the highlights of this year on the blog ❤

Continue reading “10 MOST-LOVED BLOG POSTS OF 2016”

HOW PREGNANCY HAS HELPED ME FIND MY VOICE

so… you should probably pour yourself a cup of coffee and get cozy for a second.

it’s one of those heart-to-heart, wish-we-were-doing-this-in-person kinda posts. it’s one that I want to chat about friend-to-friend, and let you know that this Holy Becoming thing is so hard and good and just incredible. I want to tell you about all the crazy ways God is real and big and just present here in new ways lately. I want to talk about how wild this journey is and how wonderfully terrible it can be to grow into a more Jesus-like creature, to grow into more of who we’re made to be.

I guess I’ll just jump right in, then.

when I was growing up, I was kind of a doormat.

no, really. I have always had a really tough struggle when it comes to communicating and voicing what I need and want from situations and people.

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I’m a chronic “yes” girl. saying no is HARD. so, for years I would go long periods without saying it, and then suddenly burst into a stubborn fit of “no!” to make up for the pent-up fear and frustration that I had allowed to build. this took its toll on friendships and situations in which I’d end up used and bitter because I’d stayed quiet and small instead of being vocal and brave. Continue reading “HOW PREGNANCY HAS HELPED ME FIND MY VOICE”

A LETTER TO MY BABY GIRL // 25 WEEK BUMPDATE

sweet little Io,

it’s amazing, you know.

you’re this whole little person, just growing away, practicing breathing through your little lungs, stretching out long, curling up small, slowly becoming this wonderful human that will be unleashed upon the world.

you have so much promise in your blood, and so much beauty and grace and strength is being passed on to you from the loving legacies of incredible women and men. I believe with all of my heart that you’ll feel it too, as you grow into your own, as you take hold of the person you’re designed as.

your blood holds brokenness and anxiety and depression and trauma, too. it holds weaknesses that have haunted your people for generations, demons that have hunted us, shadows we’ve cowered in. you’ll come to understand these stories in time, I know; and, though I pray it’s not the case, you may have to learn to own them as your own and fight them better than we’ve fought them. don’t shrink away from this part of you; it is important. stand on my shoulders, sweet girl. learn from our defeats, and carry our love and your learning into battle.

these terrifying possibilities are why I thought I might never want to carry a child, never want to watch her suffer under the weight of things I’ve suffered. but I know now that you’re being built strong as well as graceful, powerful as well as fragile, fierce and full of fire as well as gentle. this is how good women are made, little one. and you’re good.

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your dad and I named you early on. we knew who you are. we felt it in our bones, and it felt right. Iola Grace. dawn of grace is what your name means, said together as one. dawn of grace is the spirit I know you’ve been given.  Continue reading “A LETTER TO MY BABY GIRL // 25 WEEK BUMPDATE”

NEW WEEKLY BLOG SERIES

Hey all!

on this wonderfully dreary pacific northwest saturday, I thought that instead of revealing them day by day, I’d give you all a heads-up of the FIVE new weekly series, soon to come on the blog, with this handy little preview of the coming blogging schedule. 🙂

I hope this gets you as excited about the future weeks as I am!!

MONDAY MANTRA
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A sweet word to get you through your monday blues, a Scripture to think on, and perhaps even some yoga tips & tricks to take with you through your week! we could all use a little more zen to start the week, am I right? Continue reading “NEW WEEKLY BLOG SERIES”

Softening your inner voice // how to be kind & firm with your heart

Well, guys, I’ll be honest with you. Today is not me at my personal best.

I mean, I guess that getting less than three hours of sleep (I love you little girl, but the insomnia you give me is a different story…) will do that to a person. I haven’t showered, I ran out of makeup halfway through doing my face, I’ve snapped at my husband twice this morning (sorry Sweetheart! I love you!), *almost* lost control of my breath and spiraled over things outside of my control, my toe is all bruised from running into a chair leg, and I’m decently sure that my hair is about 97% dry shampoo at this point.


Any ladies been there? Yup, raise that hand WAY up there.

It’s days like these where my guard is down, my heart is vulnerable, and my stance shaky. It’s these moments where it’s easy to go “oh, real genius move Moriah. What an idiot.” every time I screw up (which is a lot of times, by the way). It’s easy to lose my voice and replace it with this judgemental, mean, nasty one that feels like an uninvited, far too intimate, stranger- constantly condemning me… And others.

It’s days like these where it’s hard to say “No! Enough! I’m not going back to that bondage!” It’s hard to fight back when you’re already worn down. And yet, wonderfully and beautifully and the hardest thing of all… It’s days like these where we HAVE to fight back.

These are the important moments. The defining ones. These are the breaths that decide if you will choose to carry on and continue to bravely become, or if you’ll shrink back, allow your voice to be stolen, become a victim of your own subconscious.

Fight, sweet friend!

But how?

Glad you asked 🙂

Softening your inner voice

1.) be kind with yourself. You can’t fight fire with fire. You can’t fight the thing trying to convince you you’re less than if you stoop to being less than to combat it. Be kind with yourself, for heaven’s sake. Give a little grace- a little praise when you find a small victory, a little gentleness when you stumble. The becoming takes time.

2.) be firm with yourself. Don’t make excuses for backing down. Do not surrender your voice without a fight. Do not allow the precious territory of your heart to be plundered. Be kind always, but be firm as well. To yourself in the battle, and to others who invite you to participate in the things you’ve fought so hard to be free from.

Be a little softer. Be a little kinder. Stand firm.

I’m with you today.

moriah currently // family surprise & moving update

J and I have a surprise for you!

over the past two months, as so many things have been up in the air and so many changes have happened (and are still happening!), divine Love decided we needed yet one more…

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yep… we’re having a baby! Continue reading “moriah currently // family surprise & moving update”