TO KNOW THE TRUTH…

any of you babes truth-seekers?

ummm duh 🙂 we are all truth-seekers, whether we know it or not. it’s in the blueprints of our soul, to seek it out and find it. only deepest brokenness can convince us otherwise.

even when we are afraid and our minds convince us to dig no deeper, our hearts yearn for it. it is the reason, when we are running from the truth, that our very souls ache and woundedness abounds.

but the ebb and flow of our hearts is a silent compass for truth. we crave it.

because deep down we know truth will set us free.

I’ve found, especially in all of the deconstructing, that it’s a scary and perilous feeling to truly seek after truth… if we’re honest with ourselves, isn’t that what stops us before we begin, sometimes?

because… what if it isn’t at all what we expect? what if it is bigger than we think? what if it grows us out of the comfortable spaces? what if it requires more of us than we think we can give? what if it changes everything?

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oh, but what if it changes everything? Continue reading “TO KNOW THE TRUTH…”

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WHAT, THEN, DO YOU LOOK LIKE?

there is a simple yet so breathtakingly profound truth that’s been winding its way through me lately. I’ve been letting it take its time to change & grow me. I’ve been doing a lot of that these days… a lot of changing & a lot of growing.

I’m thankful. the Divine & holy process of soul expansion is the loveliest, most intimate thing to happen to a human being, and it’s hard & wonderful & so so incredible & freeing, and I’m. Just. So. Thankful.

so, this truth… here it is:

you will always start to look like what you believe in.

did you catch that, friend?

you will ALWAYS start to look like what you believe in.

always. whatever you believe in with all of your heart will always manifest within you, burrowing roots and growing branches, laden with spiritual fruit, stretching out of you for all of the world to see.

it will become the breadth of who you are.
it will become the way that people see you.
it will become your forever-mirror.
it will become your legacy.

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what, then, do you look like?

who are your beliefs making you into?

if your beliefs are full of legalism, exclusivity, suspicion, fear, hierarchy, privilege, condescension, or threatening language… you’re going to look a lot like hatred, bigotry, arrogance, superiority, and anger.

if your beliefs are full of mercy, loyalty, hope, patience, kindness, peace, faithfulness, goodness, love, joy, self-control… well, you’re going to look like that.

it’s my raw longing, babes, to look like love.
to look love-ly.
it’s honestly all I want in the world… for all the souls around me to see me and think “wow, that’s what love looks like.” because that’s who my Jesus is. Love.

and did you notice that many of the latter things are what we like to call the fruit of the Spirit? yeah… remember where Scripture also tells us that it’s all about the fruit of our lives… all about the growing up and out of us of the blessedness of grace?

so what do you look like?

what do you want to look like?

DEAR FRIEND

Dear friend…

if you are feeling lost, alone, marginalized, heartbroken, or hopeless, know this:

I AM FOR YOU.

JESUS IS WITH YOU.

you are not alone. there may be those who would desire to rip you apart, but sweet soul, they don’t win.

we who hold true & cling fast to the heart of our precious Jesus will always find those on our side. we will always find hope when we need it. we will always find sweet peace & a gentle home for our weary souls when we feel we cannot go on.

so when you are living in fear and looking around at a world broken with pride & hatred, remember this…


come back to your breath. this is the core of your physical & emotional self.

recognize that growth involves mourning. saying goodbye to the old things is painful, and it’s really really good.

release the toxic things. they stunt your growth. they break your will.

cling to what is good. this is your lifeline because all good is from Jesus.

remember your inherent worthiness as a daughter of Divine Love. you’ve been filled with a brilliant breath of glory. and yes, you’re worthy. worthy. worthy

know that your wild can also be your holy. 

love yourself fiercely, the way your are SO LOVED by the Divine, and let that love spill over to soak everyone around you with that fearless, brave, intentional LOVE.

we will make it through this. together.

TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF (70+ IDEAS)

hey babes!

how’s your heart? did you know that May is the Mental Health Awareness Month? of course, this holds a very special space in my heart. as someone who has battled anxiety disorders, phobias, and depression for nearly her whole life, caring for my mental health & making others aware of the reality of mental illness, is super important to me.

so, in celebration of this month, I thought I’d share with you some thoughts & ideas for caring for your own mental health.

because, honestly, your mental health is the MOST important- it affects every other type of health… physical, emotional, and spiritual.

so, loves, here are some ideas for taking care of yourself and silencing the shame surrounding mental illness. Continue reading “TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF (70+ IDEAS)”

CHILDLIKE FAITH? IT’S NOT WHAT YOU THINK. REALLY.

BABES.

are you ready to talk about another one of those misused christian-ese phrases? the one I’ve got for you today is one that has blown my mind since I’ve stopped to think about what it actually means, underneath all of the perceived uses and baggage it perhaps carries. and now that I’ve soaked in all the goodness it actually holds, I’m juuuust a little obsessed with it.

sometimes we get it wrong. all of us. the problem comes when we take what we got wrong and use it to teach others. that’s what I believe happened with this really incredible teaching of Jesus.

if you’ve grown up or been around fundamentalist or evangelical circles for much of your life, you’ve probably heard the term “faith like a child” or “childlike faith” tossed around pretty frequently.

here’s where it comes from, in case you weren’t sure:

about that time the disciples came to Jesus and asked, “who is greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven?” Jesus called a little child to him and put the child among them. then he said, “I tell you the truth, unless you turn [change] and become like little children, you will never get into the Kingdom of Heaven. so anyone who becomes as humble as this little child is the greatest in the Kingdom of Heaven. and anyone who welcomes a little child like this on my behalf is welcoming me.
//matthew 18:1-5//

Jesus is all about living life like. a. child.

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this is often taken and only half of the meaning is used. little once are so full of dependence. they’re so completely in love with their parent, often mimicking every move and following every step.

but here’s the other thing…

if you’ve ever been around a toddler, you’ll know this: they ask all the questions. Continue reading “CHILDLIKE FAITH? IT’S NOT WHAT YOU THINK. REALLY.”

BE MOVED

I was listening to a song in the car today.

I was making my way to my favorite local coffee shop to do some work and was just trying to think and pray for a bit of inspiration to fall out of the sky. I have so much going on in my head, so many things to do, that my inspired self had kind of been taken over by to do lists and requirements. who else has totally been there?

but as I was listening to this song and allowing the beauty of the words and melody to sweep over me, I was moved. nearly to tears, but thoroughly to inspiration.

how often do we let the beauty of it all become the background noise?

how often are we okay with drifting because feeling is just too hard when there are so many aches in our souls?

how often do we allow ourselves to shut down and just make it through the day instead of bravely feeling all that the world has to offer… the good AND the bad?

how hard is it to be shaken from our rigidness and simply be moved?
be changed?
be loved?

be beloved.

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because that is what you are called, beauties.

you are beloved. 
so be. loved. 
and be. love.

but first… be moved.
let the movement show you just how loved you are. just how worthy you are made. just how full of the Divine you are.
just how capable you are of moving others to know these. same. truths.

don’t allow fear to box up your heart and hide it away from feeling. that’s where the apathy sets in. don’t allow the past wounds and hurts to callous over your heart and make you numb. that’s where the bitterness sets in.

keep feeling. keep being moved. keep soaking up the joy.

be moved today.

THIS GLORIOUS HOUSE

hi babes.

it’s been a bit, huh?

lots of processing and healing and (I’ll be real) just plain craziness going down over here. and it’s GOOD. I’ve got some insane stuff that I’m currently working on which will be coming at you next month… and it is honestly just the culmination of some of the biggest dreams & greatest fears of my heart that I didn’t even know I had, y’all. so you’re not gonna want to miss it.

I thought it might be profitable for me to let you into the sweetness that is this journey for me, and to break open some of that breathlessness that has been rebuilding me…

because sometimes I need to be reminded that what comes to me is for me. that what takes part in my deconstruction does, by default, take part in my rebuilding. that all the things that are happening in me now are working to make a greater and more purposeful future that is so worth living.

what about you?

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I love the visualization of being the dwelling place of Grace & Truth.. a house in which the Divine feels at home… a residence for the Spirit of Peace. that is a picture that has always just spoken to me really deeply. and what’s lovely is that in the book of Haggai I get this whole new insight into what that could mean, into what it must mean, as I read about the people of God rebuilding the temple.

“the future glory of this house will be greater than the past glory… and in this place I will give you peace…” Haggai 2:9

Continue reading “THIS GLORIOUS HOUSE”

SOFTENED LIKE SAND

goodness is doing its work in me, and it’s face looks a lot like trial.

every time I go to the beach I spend the first day clinging to the sand. terrified of the waves and the way they crash, white foam sputtering, into themselves. flinging bits of sand and seaweed into the salty air. thrashing upon the shore like violent fists coming down hard on a pillow of gritty sand.

perhaps it’s childish. perhaps I’m just not very brave.

but they scare me at first. every time. no matter how old I get.

I imagine getting thrashed and pummeled by those angry fists of water and foam. imagine getting dragged like a rake through turbulent under-currents. just thinking about it sends little spurts of anxiety, like lightning, through my chest.

ah, yes. goodness is doing its work in me, and it feels a lot like being drowned, sputtering and gurgling, to the bottom of a swirling ocean.

and if I’m honest… the shore feels so much safer, so much objectively smarter, so much kinder to a battered & waterlogged heart.

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but the sand is only smooth from being softened.

and I am only gentle from being rubbed the wrong way till all my sharp edges are gone.  Continue reading “SOFTENED LIKE SAND”

PALMS OPEN

hi beauties. I love you guys so much.

today I have a really important chat for y’all. it’s not only timely for Palm Sunday, but it’s a valuable & precious mantra for a lifetime. yeah. it’s that piercing.

when Jesus entered the city, the people waved palm branches & blessed Him, and later on they received Jesus Himself on the cross. today we open our palms to bless Him still & receive His goodness and blessing.

there’s a term we use in yoga: “palms up to receive.”

as we sit in meditation, or pause, steady in our breath, in a pose full of difficulty, we often remind ourselves or our students to simply turn our hands so our palms face up- a posture of surrender, openness, and release.

it’s a softness, a gentleness, a simplicity in the midst of spiritual tension. it’s an offering in the midst of emotional scarcity. it’s a song of sweetness in the screaming bitter season of the soul.

this is our Palm Sunday everyday.

this is our silent shout of hosanna, defiant in the chaos of a world shrieking with fear & demanding our worry and panic. Continue reading “PALMS OPEN”

SPIRITUAL ABUSE // WHAT IT IS & HOW TO GET FREE

hey fam!

today I want to chat with you about a topic that can be really triggering and scary for some of us. it’s been weighing on my heart & I want to just get this truth out of me and shed some light on it okay?

many of us are probably familiar with the terms of sexual abuse/domestic abuse/emotional abuse… these are all deeply dehumanizing and disturbing behaviors that need to be called out & shut down. but something that so many people I know have been a victim of, and which most people don’t even seem to realize exists, is a despicable thing called spiritual abuse.

what is spiritual abuse?

spiritual abuse comes in many forms and wears many disguises. it can be subtle and hard to recognize or loud and blatant. here are just a few ways it can read its ugly head…

MISUSE OF SCRIPTURE

spiritual abuse most often happens when people throw around scripture incorrectly and without reverence, such as using it: out of context, to shame, to ostracize, to excuse or perpetrate cruel behaviors, to prove a point, to shut down a conversation, to silence, to blame, to mock, to build their high horse, to belittle, to brush off, to shrink your pain, to avoid the topic, to divert attention away from their own faults, with condescension, with anger, without kindness… the list could go on. the bottom line here is this: if you have ever been belittled, shamed, brushed off, silenced, or made to feel like your pain was irrelevant with quoted scripture, you have been a victim of spiritual abuse.


THE NARROW ROAD COMPLEX Continue reading “SPIRITUAL ABUSE // WHAT IT IS & HOW TO GET FREE”